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The young man that killed Chris that
night wasn't a habitual drunk. He wasn't even a heavy drinker.
That night his blood alcohol level was .10. Many people weren't
even immediately aware that he was under the influence. This
should tell us that any one of us could, if we're not aware
of our alcohol use, kill another or ourselves.
"It is a pain that you can't imagine,
you can't comprehend, and I pray you never know what I've
gone through" says Chris's father Jon Jordan. "I
imagined many things that I would be doing on my boy's 21st
birthday, picking out a coffin for him was certainly not one
of them"
Jon has done a lot of work since his son
was killed two days before he was to turn 21. He has spoken
about this incredible tragedy many, many times to DWI offenders,
and students all around the state.
As I spoke with Jon over breakfast in preparation
for this story, it became clear what he was speaking about
today was hope. "I don't want anyone to get the impression
that I'm somehow over my sons death. It hurts, it hurts every
day, but there are people out there today that need to know
that there is Hope".
What Jon has learned, is that even in the
middle of the pain, in the deepest darkness of the hell, he
still has the ability to make a choice. "I've seen too
many people live in the hate, live in the anger. The longer
you live there the harder it is to pull yourself back."
"In the months and years following Chris's death, I wanted
to be angry, I wanted to hate. The driver of that car didn't
deserve my forgiveness. He killed my son. . . . I learned
that the forgiveness wasn't for the boy who was driving that
night, it was for me. Whether he deserved it or not, I did.
I wasn't going to be able to let go of the hate until I forgave,
and made the choice to live".
One of the last greeting cards that Chris
gave his father included a personal note inside that read;
'thank you for being you', as though Chris was helping his
father by saying; 'don't forget the lessons you taught me'!
When Chris was growing up, like every
father Jon dreamed of what his son would grow to become. A
doctor, a lawyer, a police officer a businessman. The fact
that he was killed before his potential was realized was a
painful blow to those dreams. But each time Jon mentioned
Chris's name, spoke of his love for hunting, sports and the
gals, he spoke as though he had realized that his son had
indeed grown to be exactly what he wanted him to be. . . A
good man.
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